Proactive Parenting and Getting Out of the Frustration Cycle
Hello Proactive Parent, Grandparent, or Therapist,
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How to Get out of the Frustration Cycle
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Why Optimal Development is Time-dictated
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Aug 19 - Aug 23, 2024 - DO ML WITH ME Schedule and Links
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New YouTube Videos
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Blog Post - Pelvis Function and Movement
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Last Week's ML Support Topics
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Upcoming Webinars
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Upcoming Travel Intensives and In-Person Clinic Training with Michelle - Limited Time
How to Get Out of the Frustration Cycle
For years, my most present emotion was frustration (and it still kind of is). I have found myself in a constant cycle of progress and frustration.
I did not understand the cycle. Things would be good, but inevitably, frustration would come. I could never pinpoint what caused it, which made me even more frustrated.
In these moments, I found it hard not to fall into a cycle of depression and anxiety.
I have a lot going on in my life. I have seven children (three of whom have special needs), and it's challenging to address their special or normal basic needs. I have a full-time job. I have a church calling. I am a wife and a friend, and so much more.
I find it challenging to take personal time. Personally, I am a loaner. I could be alone for months, come out and engage with everyone for a week, and then return to my solitary ways.
With seven children, that is not the lifestyle I chose, and IT's CHALLENGING!
Returning to cycles of frustration, I realized that the same things did not always cause my frustration. Sometimes, it was a lack of progress with my children. Other times, it was a lack of progress with my work. Other times, it was a lack of progress with my personal development, and other times, it was a lack of progress with my spiritual growth.
Then, it finally dawned on me that my frustration was due to A LACK OF PROGRESS in ANYTHING; therefore, if I want less frustration, I need more progress. After studying the mathematics of movement for years, I realized that the only way to have constant progress was to take the principles of movement that Michelle teaches and apply them in all aspects of my life.
This was a fantastic realization, and it's easier said than done, but I finally had hope that I could be satisfied with the various aspects of life that I found most challenging and feel like I was making constant progress.
I am currently still at the beginning of this journey. The first step I have taken is to take my life and make it time-dicated versus self-dictated. What does that mean? Instead of waiting for me to feel like doing something, I have found an overarching purpose to focus my life around and have created a schedule to help me make progress towards accomplishing that purpose. Then, I made sub-purposes within each of the various aspects of life and made a basic schedule for those things.
The point of the schedule, or being time dictated, is to take the time to do designated tasks, even if I don't feel like doing them. I want my purpose more, so I do the tasks anyway. Another reason for scheduling is to take the thinking out of it. The less thinking I have to do about a task that needs to be done, the more likely it is to get done.
For my children, I designated one-on-one time with them daily (which means I am spending individual time with each of them). Even though I am doing one-on-one time every day, each child gets one-on-one time every week with me. When the scheduled time comes to do this, I stop what I am doing and spend time with my kids. I don't think about it; I do it.
For my work, I designated time for customer support and meeting times. When the scheduled time comes to do this, I stop what I am doing and spend time with my kids. I don't think about it; I do it.
For my spiritual life, I dedicate a day and a half out of the week to more purposeful worship. When the time comes to do this, I stop what I am doing and spend time with my kids. I don't think about it; I do it.
I have yet to schedule some alone time for myself, but everything is a work in progress.
There are more things I need to schedule in my life, and I am figuring out how to make a schedule that is actually doable rather than unrealistic and exhausting. This means that as I look at my purpose and the milestone goals I have that will help me make progress towards this purpose, I have to prioritize: what are daily time-dictated goals, what are weekly time-dictated goals, what are monthly time-dictated goals, and so on.
Optimal Development is Time-dictated
You may have heard Michelle or I talk about time-dicated development, and you probably thought, "What does that mean?"
It's a common false belief that every child develops at their own pace and in their own time. That's why when a parent is worried about their child's development, their worries are brushed aside.
You should know from personal experience that when you are left to your own devices, you get nothing done. You may get some things done, but for the most part, your life is full of half-finished projects, and if projects are getting done, the quality of the completed project is not that great. The biggest reason for this is you don't have a defined purpose behind the tasks that need to get done, and you don't have a schedule.
When you see your child's non-optimal development, this is what's happening in their bodies. There is no definition of development. Movement takes work, and they have to think about it. Milestones are half-hazardly accomplished or skipped altogether.
Movement Lessons teaches your child's body how to have a purpose in development. That purpose is optimal functioning. By doing Movement Lessons on a consistent schedule with your child, you teach that optimal functioning is time-dictated, meaning your child will move optimally even when they don't feel like it. Movement lessons teach you how to take the thinking out of your child's movements so they just happen.
As you learn to be a proactive parent, the first thing you have to do is define the purpose behind doing what you do. Then, you have to create a schedule so you are making constant progress toward that goal.
When it comes to your child's development, your purpose is to give your child optimal development through movement lessons. Then, you have to create a schedule so you can know that you and your child are making constant progress toward that goal.
When you start out doing Movement Lesson, you are not going to understand much, but know this. As long as you work with your child consistently with gentle touch and rotation, you are teaching your child optimal movements, which turns into time-dictated optimal functioning and development.
I am no exception to these rules. I have spent many years teaching movement lessons, and I saw the most progress when I had a schedule and consistently worked on my kids.
Below is the current schedule that I have with my kids. For many years, I have felt alone and dumb as I did movement lessons alone. I had a lot of doubt, wondering if I was really making a difference. Still, Michelle instilled that vision of optimal development, and I wanted it more than anything for my baby and the babies that followed. I kept doing movement lessons despite the doubt because I believed movement lessons could offer their bodies movements I couldn't get from any other therapy or alternative modality.
Over the years, I have watched my children optimize, and I don't have to do movement lessons by faith anymore; I know it works. Even when I am not exactly sure what I worked on, but I know I worked with my kids using gentle touch and rotation. With that I expect to see something improve. Most of the time, that improvement is very small, but like like steady drops of water will eventually fill an ocean, steady optimal movement input will eventually bring out every potential your child is capable of.
You don't have to spend as much time as I do doing movement lessons with my kids. I have seven children, but 1 hour a week, 3 hours a week, 1 hour a day working with your child will make a world of difference in their optimal development.
Feel free to email me your schedule if you need someone to share it with. You can do that by responding to this email.
Do ML With Me Schedule - August 19 - 23, 2024
Below is my schedule for the ML Home Application.
You don't have to figure this out alone. Pick a time and come and Do ML with me!
The passcode is Optimize for EVERY Zoom link.
On Monday, from 7:00 a.m. to 7:55 a.m. MDT, I will work with my 7-year-old on Shoulder and Standing With Support Milestone
ZOOM LINK:
On Monday, from 6:00 p.m. to 6:55 p.m. MDT, I will work with my typical 6-year-old (for 30 minutes) on spine and chest coordination
I will work with my typical 8-year-old (for 25 minutes) on optimizing vision functions
ZOOM LINK:
On Monday, from 7:00 p.m. to 8:55 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 7-year-old on Chest and Standing With Support Milestone
ZOOM LINK:
On Tuesday
- from 2:15 to 2:45 p.m. MDT, I will be working with my husband's shoulders, incorporating Michelle's Grabbing the Feet Exercises (31 years old).
- from 2:45 to 3:00 p.m. MDT, I will be working with my active 3-year-old on counterbalance between head and chest.
- from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 2-year-old on seizure recovery and face (nose and ears)
- from 4:00 to 5:00 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 5-year-old on Head and Vision
ZOOM LINK:
On Wednesday, from 7:00 a.m. to 7:55 a.m. MDT, I will work with my 7-year-old on Head and Standing With Support Milestone
ZOOM LINK:
On Wednesday, from 7:00 p.m. to 8:55 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 7-year-old on Gut and Standing With Support Milestone
ZOOM LINK:
On Thursday from 7:00 to 7:55 a.m. MDT, I will work with my 16-month-old on breath and heavy head.
ZOOM LINK:
On Thursday
- from 2:15 to 2:45 p.m. MDT, I will work on myself working on optimizing vision functions (34 years old).
- from 2:45 - 3:00 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 3-year-old on jumping and spine
- from 3:00 to 4:00 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 2-year-old on seizure recovery and mouth work
- from 4:00 to 5:00 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 5-year-old on shoulders and reaching.
ZOOM LINK:
On Friday, from 7:00 a.m. to 7:55 a.m. MDT, I will work with my 7-year-old on Ankles and Knees and Standing With Support Milestone
ZOOM LINK:
On Friday, from 7:00 p.m. to 8:55 p.m. MDT, I will work with my 7-year-old on Eyes and Standing With Support Milestone
ZOOM LINK:
If the schedule above is confusing to you, below is a picture showing the times I am working on my children. If your email browser blocks pictures, be sure to approve the content in this email so you can see the image below. Remember that the time zone is MDT.
Some things to remember:
- The time zone is MDT (Mountain Daylight Time)(Colorado time zone).
- You can attend any Zoom, but if you have an active or less active child, typical to severe special needs, I tried to specify on the calendar when you can catch a session that might be more fitting for your particular home situation.
- You can hop on, be on mute, and turn your video off if you would like. You are not required to talk during this time, but you are more than welcome to observe a home session if you want to do that.
- You are not required to do the same thing I am doing. I will be doing my home ML session, and you can be doing yours.
If you still have questions, please email Erin at [email protected] and let me know.
If you have specific lessons you would like to see me do with my kids, please reply to this email and let me know.
Parents and professionals have loved this unique insight into my home movement lessons; I hope to see you there, too!
My goal is to encourage you to make your own ML schedule with your kids and then organize your lives to stay true to that schedule. It's okay if my times do not work for you. Make a schedule that does, and then start consistently doing your movement lessons.
Remember to define the exceptions to your schedule so that you don't beat yourself up for not sticking to it, and then stick to your schedule otherwise. (Like when I go out of town, and I am not with my kids, I am not going to beat myself up for not being able to work on them) Sticking to a schedule is critical to seeing change and feeling like you are genuinely making a difference in optimizing your child's development as you give them optimal movement experiences.
If you are not sure where to start, start by:
(1) Enrolling in the Fast Start Support Program - CLICK HERE to join for 60 DAYS FREE!
(2) Do the "What is Movement Lesson Course." Do that course for a week
(3) Then you want to spend at least one week with each of the developmental courses, doing them in order so you can learn how to evaluate and see optimal movement and development
(4) If you have done all the courses in the Fast Start Support Program, then you want to get into the Complete Optimal Development Program so you can start Segment One Training - CLICK HERE to join
(5) if you still have questions, respond to his email.
If you are in a Movement Lesson support program,
- I help you understand and learn Movement Lesson faster
- I teach you how to start having immediate success in optimizing your child's development
- I help you transition into Michelle's language of development and the movement process so you can really catch the essence of what she expresses in her videos
- I help you feel hope and confident that you can do this
- I fill in the gaps that are preventing you from having more frequent and amazing home movement lessons
Below, you will see new content published this week and where you can find it. Again, don't feel like you have to go through it all; watch what is relevant to you today and what you need. If you need help finding content, please respond to this email with the specific information you are looking for.
Catch the New YouTube Videos of the Week.
>>> CLICK HERE to watch our MILESTONE MONDAY video on "How a 4-Point Crawl Develops for Optimal Milestoning"
. >>> CLICK HERE to watch our WEBINAR WEDNESDAY video on "The Development Milestones 3 Months Old: Toys, Social Interaction, and Baby's First Giggles"
>>> CLICK HERE to watch our FREEDOM FRIDAY on "4 Keys to Getting the Optimal Milestone of 4-point Crawling"
>>> CLICK HERE to watch our most recent ALL ABOUT MOVEMENT Podcast Episode, "How to Evaluate for Movement," with Michelle Turner and Scott Davies
Read our Blog
>>> CLICK HERE to read about "Pelvis Function and Movement"
Last Week's ML Support Topics
You can watch the replays of these zooms if you are in our Optimal Development Program (Fast Start Support Program). CLICK HERE to join. To review the videos, look at the archived Monday and Wednesday Zoom Products.
Last Monday's Support Zoom Topic: Getting Behind, Recommit, Consistency
Last Wednesday's Vision Support Zoom Topic: Three Pillars of Vision Function
Michelle's Upcoming Webinars - CLICK HERE to sign up to watch them live
- (AUGUST 22, 2024) Warning Signs: Crawling
Travel Intensive Opportunities with Michelle Turner
The Czech Republic (September) - SOLD OUT!
Orlando, Florida (November) - SOLD OUT!
Training Opportunities with Michelle Turner
Beginners Touch Training in Arizona
>>> CLICK HERE to reserve your spot now! (October)
Newborn Movement Assessment in the Czech Republic
>>> CLICK HERE to reserve your spot now! (September)
Remember, whenever you do a movement lesson, you give your child the gift of optimal development.
Respectfully,
Erin Fulks
Movement Lesson™ Practitioner
Movement Lesson™ Support